Saturday, October 5, 2013

Lillian Belle's Birth Story

Lillian's birth was one from a dream. I feel so blessed to have had such an incredible experience and more importantly, our sweet girl is healthy.

From the time of my water breaking and first contraction to the time she was was only 4 hours and 42 minutes. 

My water broke on August 3rd at 8:29pm. I only know this because I was lying in bed timing contractions at the time. The two contractions that I had prior to "the" contraction that started it all were wimpy compared to what was to come. I was lying in bed and Matt was chillin' in the living room. I timed the first two and could breathe through them on my own, no need to call Matt in. I'd been having contractions (light contractions) all week and thought for sure this was just another start-stop. I was actually googling "Does getting your membranes stripped work?" at the time. When "the" contraction started, I immediately knew it was different and screamed for Matt. He came flying into the room and saw me with my eyes closed and lay down next to me to calm me and help me breathe. We lay there breathing through it for about 30 seconds when..."POP!" and then...gush... We looked at each other in fear (we didn't know you could hear your water breaking) and then I said, "My water just broke!" I practically jumped up out of bed and ran to the bathroom. I peed a ton. So..knew it wasn't pee. The second I wiped and stood up...gush...and another INTENSE contraction. (Just 3 minutes apart now).

Matt held me in our bathroom as I tried to breathe through it. We slow danced through it and Matt helped me stay calm. The second that one was over, I looked at him and said, "I know what I've said in the past, I know I know...but I'm just telling you now, I am for sure getting an epidural." Matt said everything I scripted him to say, "You won't feel your legs," "You won't have control," etc. I told him I knew but something wasn't normal about this. It was way to fast and intense. Matt called the hospital and then his mom while I called my parents and tried to talk to my mom. I had to put her on speaker as I breathed through another contraction. 

Matt ran around like a crazy man packing up everything with the 3 minutes he had in between each contraction. I changed my clothes, grabbed whatever I could think of 9:30pm we were out the door to the hospital.

I had to have 3 contractions in the car (shortest drive every thank goodness). I do remember listening to "Details in the Fabric" by Jason Mraz (all time favorite song) on repeat on the way there.
When we arrived, we both agreed it would be a good idea for me to go in and Matt park the car so I didn't have to walk. When I walked in I immediately had another contraction. The annoying receptionists didn't understand what I was trying to tell her and kept trying to ask me my name as I kept my head down to breathe through yet another crazy contraction. I think I told Matt several times that I was dying. Yet...according to Matt I was intensely calm. Didn't feel calm. Matt walked in and explained what was happening and gave them all my information. They brought a wheelchair down and wheeled me up as I had another contraction. I was not at all a fan of having contractions while sitting down. We got up to labor and delivery and I got checked. I think Matt had to help me with everything getting changed into my gown because they contractions kept coming. This part is actually a blur. I had my playlist on my iPhone and never turned it off, even walking into the hospital. 

When I got checked, I was at a 4. My water had definitely broke (it was still leaking everywhere..actually throughout my entire labor it kept coming) I kept apologizing to everyone about it. Eventually I heard I needed to stop apologizing. Once I was checked, they got me into my birthing suite. In my original plan, I pictured this time with Matt to be the two of us preparing our room and every now and then getting through a contraction. this point, my contractions were hitting hard and about every 2 minutes. The nurse told me they were going to put in an IV. I then proceeded to tell her the only thing I didn't want was an IV. I wanted to go in the tub, I wanted to move around. She told me they would put in a hepa lock (sp?) so I could move around. I gave in. She said if something were to go wrong, it would be much better to have this taken care of then instead of in the heat of a moment. I was nervous for it but it was okay. Right before they started the IV, my midwife Lori came in and I cried as I was so relieved. Matt's mom and my friend Jessica got there around the same time.

I just kept breathing through them all. 
I tried the tub, I leaned over the bed, I tried sitting on the ball, I held onto Matt or Lori whenever I could. They started getting more and more intense. At one point, Lori wanted me to go pee. We went into the bathroom just the two of us and she had a heart to heart with me. She told me that this birth was my experience and if I wanted to get an epidural, no one would judge me and I was just as strong. She said she would support it 100%, but wanted me to try a few more things to get a little closer. I agreed and that was when I got into the tub. I didn't last very many contractions in there. Then had to wait to get my epidural (felt like forever) for like 10-15 minutes as he was giving one to another woman already. I knew I could make it through a few more but was worried about staying still sitting through the contractions as he gave me the epidural. I had 2 while this was happening.

Once I had the epidural, I felt a huge rush of excitement and calmness. I fully realized that soon we were going to meet our baby. Matt said that to me a few times. My parents were then on Skype and I even had my father in law, brother in law and sister in law come in the room. I was so comfortable. I could feel my legs a lot still which made me so happy, but I couldn't feel the contractions other than my catheter. I remember rapping with my Dad and just laughing a lot and feeling so excited.

Right after I got the epidural I got checked and was at a 7. I was progressing so quickly. 
My whole body was shaking and Lori explained that was because I was in transition. I then again got so excited knowing that meant it was close. A little while later, I asked what it would feel like to push. She explained and then I said, "mmm I think I have that." Lori checked and..I was at a 9! At this time, she told me us, "I can feel her hair, I'm playing with it, it's really long!" I was so excited. I always imagined we would have a bald baby.

At this point, everyone was just excited about meeting her. About 5-10 minutes after she checked me at a 9, I looked at Lori (no one else was really paying attention, Matt said he never saw this part happen and is a little bummed) and I said "I think I have to poop"...Jessica said, "No, I think you have to have a baby!" :) So Lori said, "Alright, let's check again." She checked, looked at me and said in the calmest voice, "Okay, you can go ahead...push." "Now??!!" "Yes, go ahead, do a practice push. Grab your legs and tuck your chin and push." "Ok!" And then...I pushed. This was probably exactly at 1am. Right as I was pushing all of a sudden there was a ton of excitement in the room. It was like everyone was so proud and amazed. She was coming! Lori quickly ran to get everything ready and Matt and I got so excited. I couldn't feel anything except a bit of pressure in my right hamstring. (The exact spot that since week 27 I have been in crippling pain, interesting). When Lori got back, I started pushing when I would have a contraction. I pushed 3 times for each contraction I had. In between each one, I would talk to everyone, felt normal and excited. I was smiling and making sure my mom and dad were still on Skype. (I was very concerned about this...probably too concerned unfortunately because I wasn't in the moment like I wish I had been.) So, each contraction I had, I'd push.

I only had to push through 5 contractions...and there she was.
It was the most surreal and amazing moment of my entire life.
She didn't really cry right away. I asked them to make her cry. And then...she came around. On her own time. She cried the most beautiful cry while she lay on my chest. Matt kissed me and we were in awe over our beautiful daughter. Once she was with me, I didn't see anything else or really know what was going on around me.

Now, looking back, I remember my stitches bugging me. I remember delivering the placenta. I remember them taking Lilly to measure her and weigh her and everyone saying how much she looked just like Matt.

{there are MANY photos that I am choosing to not put on the internet...National Geographic style...}

Mel, Clint & Lance came back in to see her and again we all agreed how much she looks just like Matt.

I was immediately so in love.
I am still so in love. Matt's so in love.
We are just feeling so complete with her.
Everything feels right now.

Our Lilly Belle is here and forever we get to be her parents and will forever love her and do anything for her. She has us both wrapped around her adorable little finger. She's our whole world.

{This was written when she was about a week old as she now hates the Boba wrap...}

My sweet girl is currently sleeping on me in the Boba Wrap as I am writing this and nothing feels better right now than being so close to her. Her little sighs and noises are the most perfect sounds I've ever heard.

....Our birth story is one I will never forget, but it is something I want Lilly to know all the details of one day.


  1. Oh my gosh, Lori delivered Sadie. LOVE her!!! Great birth story :)

    1. That's so awesome, Marta! We love her so much too!! :)

  2. Such a great story and amazing pictures! Were you not able to wear the gown you made?

    1. Thanks! And ha! It went so fast that when we got there, Matt was like, do you want me to go get your gown you made and I remember saying "NO who cares!" LOL

    2. I did wear it while we stayed in the hospital though :)