Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Need to Slow Down...

*Note: I'm writing this blog so I can look back and remember, not really for anyone's entertainment but my own. That being said, this post may be really boring for some, but it's real life right now and I want to remember what a crazy woman I was while being pregnant and dancing everyday. I also want our kids to read it one day and know how much I thought about them every second of every day trying to give them best life possible.*
Making a baby is hard. I should say growing a baby is hard.
My body is going through tons of crazy changes, both expected and unexpected.
I am nothing short of exhausted. I blame that part mostly on my job.

That's what this post is about. I'm working too much. I offer too much. Our team is going to competition in just 2 weeks and to make sure I have all the kids ready I am practicing with these girls everyday, Monday-Sunday. I don't get paid for the team, so I definitely did not have to do this. But I wanted to help them. In doing so though, I'm not helping myself which means I'm not helping our baby which makes me really mad at myself. We've been having practice like this since the 3rd. It's now the 16th and I'm already done. February is going to be so nice. I gave the girls the week off after their competition and then 2 weeks later we have no classes at all anywhere for mid-winter break. *sigh* a whole week off to sleep! 

I have to keep pushing through this. 23 hours of teaching/coaching a week this month. I made it through so far being 8 & 9 week pregnant. Mondays and Tuesdays are the worst. I don't know what I was thinking. Monday nights I teach/coach for 4 hours (4-8pm). By around 7 every night I'm ready for bed. I practically kicked the kids and parents out of practice on Monday. No actually, I did. I said, "Ok seriously, you guys have to go home now (8:05) this baby is eating my stomach! I need dinner!" They all left laughing, while I left starving lol. I need to bring more snacks with me.  Tuesdays are my day from hell. I teach 2-3's and 3-5's ballet/tap from 10:00-11:45...then I come home for lunch and then teach at one of our preschools from 3:00-4:45 (2 more 3-5's classes)...straight from the preschool I drive to the Community Center to teach Girls Hip Hop 5-8 and then Boys Hip Hop 6-10 from 5:00-6:45. Last night a sweet sweet mom brought me muffins because she wanted me to snack in between hip hop classes. The boys were also so sweet yesterday finding out that their teacher was breakdancing WITH a baby in her tummy.... Yeah, that would me stupid me. Last night when I got home I was greeted with the most awesome cramps. (Sorry baby!!!) No more butt spins, donkey kicks, coffee grinders or 6-steps for this mama...

Here's to hoping that weeks 10 & 11 are nice to me! Today I just have 1 class. One beautiful nice class of 4-6 year olds for just 45 minutes at the studio. *sigh* I declared today "My Day," and am still currently in my pajamas with Disney Rides playing on YouTube in the background of our morning. Matt is doing laundry for me. Last night I woke up in the middle of the night stressing about work from my dream and then realized that the thing I was stressing over is actually a problem I need to solve in real life, and then I thought I was going to be sick. Thankfully I fell back asleep. Yuck. 

I need to come up with a solution to cut back on how much I'm teaching. Which also means I'm in the process of cutting back a lot of our classes in general. This stress is not worth it. The most important thing to me in my whole life has always been having a family. I want more than anything to be a "Stay at Home Mom". I'll kind of get to be that, just with lots of work thoughts floating around in my head while I'm making breakfast. That's the part I don't want. Time to fix that. I love my dance kids so so much, but lately, the bigger and bigger my tummy gets...our Little Bean is taking up so much of that love and needs it a lot more. I've got to figure out a good balance.

Okay, no more writing, now I need to go make a game plan and get ready to watch "The View" :) 

Happy Wednesday! 


  1. So happy for you two! Take it easy and when your body needs sleep make sure you take a break :) your body is hard at work creating a human being! Crazy to think about huh?! Wait till you meet that little baby :) its a miracle we can create something so beautiful and perfect. When is your next appointment? If you ever have any questions just let me know. Congrats again! August will be here before you know it

    1. Thanks Randi! Our next appt is January 29th. Thank you so much :)